Wednesday, October 6, 2010

Tenth Anniversary of the Tasty Titanic

My wedding cake was ugly.

It wasn't tacky or cutesy, or anything like that - the caterer dropped a case of soda on the "real" one on the morning of my Big Day, so they tried to make another one realquick and frosted it while it was still hot.

It looked sort of like the Titanic: Listing to the side, as if it had recently collided with a gnarly ice burg. The little bride and groom were up to their knees in white liquid sugar and roses looked like they were melting down the sides. It cost us hundreds of dollars, but my mom made sure that she got a refund.

When we arrived at the reception, my mother blocked my way to the door. The following conversation is the best recollection that my memory can serve:

MOM: Uhm, we have a problem. It's the cake. It's, well, you might have to see it for yourself...
ME/BRIDE: *GASP* What happened to it?
MOM: It...It looks like it is a little bit squashed, it-
ME/BRIDE: Squashed? What do you mean squashed?
MOM: They ruined the first one, so-
ME/BRIDE: You mean the ugly cake is the second cake?
MOM: Yes.

I looked at my new husband and decided that a sinking cake wasn't going to ruin our special day. We burst into laughter and my mom gave a huge sigh of relief. MacG and I made our grand entrance to "Groove is in the Heart" and we sailed by the disgraceful dessert as we crossed to our table.

Although it had the appearance of being slowly sucked into the Bermuda Triangle, and by the time we cut it it had turned from a three- tiered cake into a lumpy one-tiered cake, we had no option other than to serve it to our two- hundred- and- some- odd guests.

It was delicious.

Life is like that sometimes, isn't it? My mother once told me this: "Life is not beautiful. You have to make it beautiful." I believe her. How many times have things gone terribly wrong, but the way you handled the situation made it even better than it could have been, otherwise? It happens to me all the time... Some of my favorite trips, friends, and purchases have become my most beloved, due to some sort of unplanned calamity.

We had a fantastic reception. It was ten years ago, this month. Looking back, I wouldn't have changed a thing - except that some of the people that I now hold near and dear would have been there. But, at the time I didn't know that they existed. I guess you can't have everything.

However: You can have your ugly cake.

And you can eat it, too.


  1. Great story, Shauna! I deeply love that you entered the reception to the sounds of "Groove is in the Heart"! :)

  2. OK - sorry I'm a little late in reading this, but I can HONESTLY say, I feel your pain. As I arrived to my wedding reception 19 and sometihng years ago, the manager of the hotel met me at the limo and said in on big breath, " It looked like rain this morning so we moved everything in ( it was supposed to be in the beautiful courtyard of the Stanford Park Hotel), and we need to cut your cake NOW because it is leaning to one side very badly and it might fall soon"! Ugh. Well - as you know - the show must go on. The cake didn't look exactly like the one I agreed to, but the problem was the bottom teir of the cake was soaked in Grand Marnier(sp). You know, the orange flavored booze. Each level of my cake was a different flavor. I like the orange flavor best, so I asked for it to be the bottom, the largest part. What the hell do I know about cake and saturation. How was I to know the little white pillars would sink, unevenly, into my beautiful, quicksand - like cake? That's why I paid the bakers the big bucks, right? But, like your cake, it really tasted good! What's not to love about booze and cake?!

  3. Yikes, Denise!!! That sounds way more hectic than my day!


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